Postpartum Emotional Distress

 

What is wrong with me?

 

This was a constant refrain in my head when I was postpartum with my first. I did not think I had PPD because I never had thoughts of harming myself or my baby. However I had postpartum rage that made me want to hurt everyone around me. I learned from my therapist this is called postpartum emotional distress. What a gift to put a name to what I was going through! When it got so bad that it was interfering with my daily life, my OB prescribed my 50mg of zoloft. What a relief! I took it for 6 months and felt so much better. I have since been postpartum 3 more times and have learned several tools to cope with my postpartum emotional distress.

 

1. Let go of perfection. There is no such thing as a perfect postpartum period. It is messy. It is painful. It is worth it. If you allow yourself the time and space to heal in the short term, you will recover faster in the long term.

 

2. Nourishing food. Plan and freeze as much in advance as possible. Give specific nourishing recipes to your friends to bring you in your postpartum period. I highly recommend reading the Postpartum Bible, "The first 40 days" This is a tremendous guide to nourishment and healing in the postpartum period of 40 days following giving birth.

 

3. Anyone can set boundaries with friends and family but not everyone can enforce them. Learn how to effortlessly enforce boundaries or appoint an advocate (maybe your partner) to be the enforcer.

 

4. Sleep and Rest. Of course this is hard to come by when caring for a newborn but there are tricks to helping your baby sleep. Get a really good sleepsack. I got the swaddelini, this will help your baby feel safe and secure like they did in your womb.

 

5. Protect your mental space. For me I needed isolation to mentally and physically heal. Whatever you need to do to create this space- do it. The investment here will pay off in the long run.

 

6. Childcare for older children. Plan this in advance. Care.com is a great resource. If possible, also plan night care in advance. Is there a resource in your community offering postpartum support for free? Google search "community doulas" or ontact your local chapter of the Maternal Infant Health Program. If you are in West Michigan try MomsBloom.  Did your bestie offer to help? Great, have her come over at 11pm or 2am (whichever works best) to hold the baby while you get some sleep.

 

 

7. If the funds are available, go from hospital to postpartum retreat hotel. This typically costs between $800-1400 a night. If the finances are there this could be the experience that sets you up to have the best recovery possible.

 

8. Pelvic floor therapy. There are so many great resources on IG for free like Dr. Jen. or see a professional in person. The point here is to give yourself awareness of that area and exercise it for maximizing recovery.

 

9. Connect with others regarding your birth experience. You need to talk about it. Whether it was empowering or traumatic, you are missing out on a tremendous healing opportunity in your recovery process if you are keeping all the pain and/or joy bottled up inside.

 

10. Avoid chores. Plan in advance with your partner, family and friends. Grocery shopping? No! Walmart+ and Instacart exist for you! You should not have any responsibilities in your first few weeks postpartum. The only person relying on you is your baby. Your baby is your only priority.

 

I hope these tips and tricks help you as much as they have helped me.

 

Wishing you an empowering birth experience!

 

Love,

 

Liz